On January 19th, 2019, United Spinal Association of Va member Vicki Varner competed in the Ms. Wheelchair Virginia pageant at Wilson Rehab in Fishersville, Va. At the conclusion of the weekend, Miss Varner rolled away with a new crown and title: Ms. Wheelchair Virginia. We invite you to take in Vicki’s journey from softball player, to pageant winner, and beyond…in her own words. Congratulations Vicki!
My Journey to Ms. Wheelchair Va
On Christmas Eve of 2015, my brother’s blue Ford Focus rode off into the night surrounded by heavy fog and crashed into an unforgiving tree just about five miles away from home. As blue flashing lights drove towards our car turned accordion, I looked down at my Christmas pajamas splattered in blood and knew that the legs that had taken me to Missouri on an athletic scholarship just 4 months prior were now paralyzed. On Christmas morning, I was told from my father and the doctor that I would never walk again. As my dad told me this news, I felt the hand that had always lifted me up in strength go weak. What do you do in a moment like that? Many would tell you that you don’t have any option but to “just” accept it. I am here to tell you that in life changing situations, YOU have the ability to decide how that unforeseen moment is going to shape the rest of your life. Sure, it is great to accept it, but it is even better to grow from it, to thrive. I decided that I absolutely had to turn this around somehow. I had to breathe strength and reassurance into not only myself, but to those people who have breathed that same strength into me. Through my couple of weeks in the ICU, I began to realize that I was lucky. Yes, you read that correctly, lucky. I was alive! My brother and boyfriend had survived the wreck and I had my arms, my mind, my spirit, and my sense of humor. I had so much opportunity to chase and so much gratitude to express. So, I chose to pick myself up off the cold floor and rise into the phoenix I am today.
The next few years would consist with very high highs and very low lows. I found myself in the hospital every couple of months within that first year and a half after injury. I was set in the belief that I could still live my life the exact same way that I did prior to my spinal cord injury, but have since learned that minor alterations were needed to live that life successfully and most importantly healthily. Those couple of years took a toll on me not only physically but mentally as well. I was terrified that this is what my life had become now and struggled to see that light at the end of the tunnel. It is easy for me to talk about the accident, but I find difficulty in talking about what happened as an after effect. Those of us who have been through trauma are usually surrounded by the love and support when the incident first occurs, but as the months go on there are less and less people in our corner. You have to dig deep and be that person who rallies on and fights the bumps that pop up in your journey. When I wheeled over those stubborn bumps in mine I was overwhelmed of all the amazing opportunities of the world and at just 20/21 I was still searching for my purpose of being. I was a fulltime student but I still wasn’t getting that fulfillment that I craved and needed. I knew I was built for more but I just didn’t know where to begin to find it. Then as life always seems to do when you least expect an opportunity fell into my lap.
I found out about the Ms. Wheelchair VA program in December. I am not going to lie at first I was a little apprehensive. I just didn’t think I could make the switch from softball dirt and cleats to pageantry. That is where I was completely wrong and where a lot of people misinterpret the program. Ms. Wheelchair VA is an advocacy program that gives women the opportunity to educate, advocate, and raise awareness for various issues within the disability community. There is absolutely nothing pageantry about it, just strong women making significant changes. Now that is something I can get behind. I have always had a strong voice and an even stronger mind. Being a Psychology and Communications major I have a solid understanding of how to communicate effectively as well how to relate to many different types of people. I knew that having the title of Ms. Wheelchair VA would require those skill sets and I had been searching for a way to put them to use in a field I have extreme passion for. It seemed like the perfect fit. During the event weekend you are asked to prepare something called the “Table of Life” which is a display that showcases who you are as a person along with your platform. You’re also asked to complete a speech on your platform and memorize it. I had a couple of weeks to get everything together which made a perfectionist like myself go a little haywire. Everything kept falling into place for me however and it really began to feel like God, fate, or whatever you may believe in was working in my favor. When I got to the event I was immediately blown away. It is extremely empowering to be around strong women from many different rolls over life who are working towards changing the world in the best way. I knew whether I won or lost that I would roll away with an amazing experience and an enhanced perspective and that is exactly what I got.
When I had the honor of winning the title, Ms. Wheelchair VA, I felt the purpose I had been craving rush through my body. I was ready to make a difference and put my platform to life. My platform is breaking down societal ableist beauty standards. I chose this platform, because women already have such high expectations on how they should look, dress, and act. When a wheelchair gets thrown into the mix society doesn’t even know what to do with itself. I plan on speaking to local and statewide ad agencies on adding much more inclusive campaigns. I also am a very fitness oriented person. Since athletics was my whole life I continue that into my daily life today. Fitness is even more important when having a disability. It helps with a whole array of issues both mentally and physically. All fitness is geared towards able bodied people and it leaves a lot of people with disabilities in the dark about how to start down their fitness journey. I plan on talking to gyms across the state and educating them on the importance of adaptive equipment and classes. I also plan on speaking at various schools on driving safety and disability etiquette to show that people with disabilities aren’t strange or abnormal, but just normal everyday people who actually have amazing things to offer. Changes start with the youth and I plan on using them to help start the changes necessary. I overall just aim towards a more adaptive and inclusive community and I working hard to achieve that. I am doing several podcasts and speaking engagements to teach the state of Virginia that disabilities are nothing to fear but something to value.
Thank you for your support and for following my journey as Ms. Wheelchair VA. I will be at Nationals in Little Rock in July and I hope the support and loves follows.
Ms. Wheelchair VA.